Non-custodial parents have such a difficult path to walk. They miss their children like crazy, have to send child support to the other parent monthly (or to the county!) and often the children are brainwashed into hating them. That’s what happened to me, with one of my children - my middle daughter.

My husband and his girlfriend had control of two of my children, did everything they could to shut me out of their lives, and caused me years of intense grief. Worse, they trained my daughter to hate me, and even now, many years later, she still hasn’t talked to me in any kind of loving daughter-to-mother way. She’s now 29.

So you non-custodial parents who are suffering grief because your children are with the other parent, or with foster parents, or have aged out and now hate you due to PAS (Parental Alienation Syndrome) . . . this is a special day for you. A day of appreciation and love.

Appreciation and love? You may be wondering if your child will ever be able to love and appreciate you. The problem is complex and doesn’t start with your child. If your child has been ripped from your loving embrace, and brainwashed by being given positive feedback for expressing negativity about you, the child isn’t likely to be the first one to recover from the experience. It is essential that non-custodial parents are able to love and appreciate themselves. We can also appreciate each other because we’re aware of the pain this entails.

Do something good for yourself today. Here’s a few ideas: start a journal if you don’t have one going yet. Start writing poetry about your missing child. Take walks to help work out your feelings. Leave a prayer request on my prayer request page which will signal me to pray for you for the next thirty days. Be gentle on yourself, even when others are cruel. You can get through this, and things will get better, of that I am sure.

This is the first Non-Custodial Parents Day ever. I chose it because it is my daughter’s 29th birthday. I couldn’t face writing her name on my calendar another year, knowing she doesn’t care about me one bit. PAS is heart-wrenching! So this year when I looked at my January calendar I wrote “Mother Appreciation Day” . . . and then I thought, why not make it a day for ALL non-custodial parents?

Please spread this message far and wide to other parents who are missing their children. Give them my love, and my appreciation for the strength they show in the face of extreme ignorance and traumatizing cruelty.

(Yes, you can copy and paste this post - I want everyone to know that we’ve got our own day now. I’d very much appreciate if you would give a link back to FightCPS: http://www.fightcps.com)

Have a great day.

Mother’s Day has been sad for me for years now. Without fail I always think of caring parents who are suffering because their children are being kept from them. Then I remember the years when my two oldest daughters lived with their father and I never, ever heard anything from them on Mother’s Day… nor did they want to talk to me at any other time. The youngest still has Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) though now she’s 28 years old. She refuses to communicate with me and thinks I’m a really, really, really bad person. (My oldest daughter recovered and realized she’d been brainwashed.)

I know a lot of you are thinking, “When my child is eighteen he/she will come see me again.” But for many of the sad, suffering parents, that never happens because of PAS.

(More about PAS/Read: What is the child’s part in PAS?)

So… for those of us with children in foster care or adoptive homes, or living with another family member or an ex-spouse… for those of us who never get to hear “Happy Mother’s Day” from their much loved children… I have a few suggestions.

1. Love yourself. Seriously, if your child won’t express love to you, find reasons to love yourself anyway. All human beings are born to be inherently lovable, and you’re one of them. Take time today to list your good qualities and praise yourself for them.

2. Here’s something that cheered me up back then when my daughters weren’t calling me. I found a big Mother’s Day ad/announcement/appreciation printed in the Oakland Tribune, and cut it out and put it on the refrigerator. It was cheerful and it really made me feel better even though it didn’t come from the two children I wanted to hear from. Those of you blessed with artistic creativity can probably get the same effect by making a card for yourself.

3. Pray for the children. They are victims just as we are. While it is true they probably aren’t calling because they don’t remember or realize it is a special day, it is also true that their handlers (whoever controls them) aren’t going to remind them to call as any truly decent person would. This isn’t your child’s fault. They are being trained to be disrespectful to their mother and to treat her like dirt. They get good reactions from the people they live with whenever they are cruel towards us.

4. Take a walk today and look at all the flowers blooming. Clear your mind from the sad thoughts and remember that life renews itself and there’s plenty to love about being alive in this world.

5. Don’t quit living, learning, and growing. You’ve had a terrible shock, and are living with trauma. But don’t let that destroy your life. Look toward your own interests and hobbies. Do things that make you happy. It is all about self-care. Yes, the thing you wanted to do (mothering) was cruelly ripped from your arms and your heart will hurt over this for many years to come… but we must learn to live with the trauma and recover from it. And we must use the time away from our children to do good things for ourselves.

A big hug from me to all suffering, lonely, traumatized mothers on this Mother’s Day 2009.

This is from activists who are planning a CPS/DPSS class action lawsuit against Riverside County and the State of California for kidnapping children without cause:

We are organizing a class action lawsuit against the State of California, and all parties involved in unlawfully detaining and holding our children against our will, and without cause. We have documented the deep, embedded corruption in the “social services” agencies in California, specifically in Riverside County, conspiring with hospitals, schools, pediatricians and the court system to take possession of our children, without cause. We have already filed three lawsuits, and are looking for other families who have also been annihilated by this Evil. For information about the class action lawsuit, email us with your facts and contact information to build a strong case against these Devils. IF YOU FEEL YOU HAVE BEEN WRONGLY TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF BY CPS, EMAIL US AT fightcpscalifornia -at- gmail.com.

These are the reasons you should be part of this lawsuit:

· CPS manufactures multiple nonexistent/fictitious abuse case scenarios to offset true statistical abuse case information.

· CPS concurrently processes these children from foster care to Adoption, in order to obtain perverse monetary incentives in the form of bonuses.

· CPS provides a market to neighboring agencies and the courts (Judges, psychologists, visitation monitors, court mandated behavioral class instructors, court appointed legal counsel, etc…), in order for them to financially benefit from the foster care/adoption system they themselves perpetuate.

· CPS victimizes innocent families, and draws them into a corrupt system to utilize their children as pawns for this corrupt child commerce.

· CPS is utilized by family court officials and attorneys as an adverse tool to extricate children from one parent to the other, with reference to “parental alienation syndrome,” where in truth, the CPS caseworkers are the ones initiating the alienation of these children from their own birth parents. Caseworkers are never allowed to testify in court under the cloak of “CPS Authority” due to possible misuse or conflict of interest related to right to privacy laws (Very convenient)

· CPS utilizes unlawful & coercive measures to persuade vulnerable parents to submit to statements of nonexistent abuse and false “Case Plans,” forcing desperate parents to “plea bargain” to a CPS fabricated crime, for the return of their children from foster care.

· CPS fabricates false allegations and most of their “investigations” to purposely mislead or misdirect a case.

· CPS intentionally fails to Criminally prosecute Parents accused of child abuse, since in the majority of cases, no initial crime has been committed. However, CPS continues to claim a crime has been committed, as THEY abuse/neglect our children.

· CPS knowingly abandons children into the foster care system, conscious that some individuals in these homes physically and/or sexually abuse those in their “protective” custody. CPS ignores crimes committed in foster care through failure to investigate.

· CPS fails to question these individuals for their abusive conduct, whereby, if it were a birth parent or not a foster care parent, these individuals would be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law in criminal court.

· CPS misrepresents themselves in positive personas by omitting, altering, and falsifying documents, so as to mislead the public and or government of their true actions as listed above. Thereby publicly grandstanding,displaying an inaccurate social martyrdom for the well being of children.

The Police should determine if children need protection from their own parents, since child abuse is a Criminal offense.

We dearly know, from our own personal case, the trauma and distress this thwarted government agency imposes (with no consequence) upon innocent families. In January 2008 the law office of Robert Powell won its appeal to the California 9th Circuit Court of Appeals. The case set a precedent by finding that CPS social workers are NOT entitled to absolute immunity for investigator conduct - particularly when they fabricate evidence, misrepresent evidence, and withhold exculpatory evidence. IF YOU FEEL THAT ANY OF THIS APPLIES TO YOUR FAMILY, email us at fightcpscalifornia -at- gmail.com. You can make a difference. Now is the time for action.

Note: This is intended for California residents only. Victims in other states can organize their own class action lawsuits.