FAQ - Frequently Answered Questions
1. Will you help me?
This is the most frequently asked question I get - and I would love to help everyone individually - but the truth is, I just don’t have time. There are thousands, or perhaps millions, of people out there needing help because of social service injustice. I get a lot of desperate emails. The need is far more than one person, group, or website could possibly handle.
So I decided to do what I thought would reach the most people all at one time. I put this site on the Internet. Now hundreds of people daily come here to get information.
If you need help from me - this site is it. Sorry I can do no more. FightCPS isn’t an organization; it is only one person dedicated to the cause of family rights. But if you’re looking for someone to talk to, someone who understands and who might have some helpful ideas, try the message forum. It’s online, easy to register for, and free. The message boards are full of truly caring people - many of whom are going through CPS hell now and others who have been through it and want to help.
Please do not email me asking for help. I am unfortunately subject to human limitations and can’t get all my email answered. The email address is on the site for two reasons: (1) for requests to have information removed from the site, and (2) for people who have trouble getting registered for the message forums.
2. Linda, why do you think it’s okay for kids to be abused?
I actually have been asked this kind of question multiple times since I started this site. Though the site clearly says the information is here for people who have been falsely accused, there are always some who think that just because I am 100% totally against the existence of CPS, this means I want kids to be abused.
Nothing could be further from the truth. I do NOT want kids abused. In fact if I knew for certain that a child was being abused, I’d go to the authorities about it. By authorities, I mean qualified Law Enforcement Officers. I’d do that because child abuse is a CRIME, not something that we should take to a social service employee whose job is to destroy families, administer forced “service” plans, and turn children into legal-orphans.
Social service workers are funded and therefore motivated by federal funding streams that start when a child is taken from its natural family and placed in state custody. Law Enforcement isn’t funded that way (per child abduction) and therefore is more likely to be impartial and fair.
Whoever thinks we need the “give me your kids” socialists doesn’t seem to realize that TRUE child abuse is a crime and Law Enforcement should take care of it. CPS workers, on the other hand, have expanded the definition of ‘child abuse’ to mean almost any little thing they might cop an attitude about. The examples are too numerous to mention here. CPS has got to be one of the most subjective and abusive agencies in existence.
3. Why do you think CPS should be eliminated?
I believe CPS as it is - is a very dangerous socialist based agency bent on destroying American families in exchange for federal ‘funding streams’. Though some CPS workers may be altruistic when they start, the job tends to destroy them. It makes them jaded and callous - until they’re totally unfeeling toward the grief, desperation, and despair of people whose families they are destroying.
CPS agencies profit not only from child detentions, but also from terminations of parental rights and subsequent adoptions. The funding doesn’t encourage reuniting families though CPS agents are told that’s what their job is for. So long as the funding is mostly anti-family, the agency makes ruthless ogres out of what otherwise might have been nice people.
My opinion, and the opinion of many other advocates and activists, is that CAPTA should be repealed. I believe CPS should be abolished, and in its place another foster-care-only agency should be established to take care of the very few children who are truly in need and without any fit extended family members able or willing to take them in.
4. Should we take the children and run, or attack the CPS workers?
No. I don’t advocate illegal activities. If you respond to an investigation by doing something illegal, you’re likely to go to jail and then there’s no way to get your children back.
Life as a fugitive is really, really difficult. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. I believe it’s best to stand your ground and fight back using legal means - in a court of law if necessary.
My site is aimed at helping people learn enough about the law to be able to successfully fight off the child welfare agents using legal documents and strategies that will put parents in a stronger position when they go back to court.
5. Where should I start?
The most important parts of this site are:
a. The legal document library. I suggest you look over the samples and see if they fit your needs.
b. The “what to do” page. It’s just my opinion, but at the bottom of that page you’ll see lots of links to other people’s ideas on what to do. It’s good to get more than one opinion.
c. The message forum. It’s full of very dedicated, caring and knowledgeable people who may have good insight and perspective on what you’re going through.
d. Who Will Prepare Your Case? This explains how CPS works and what you need to do to fight them in court.
If you have a question that wasn’t answered here - you can go ahead and email me. Please do not include details about your case. Those would be better placed on the message forum so people who have motivation and time to address your specific case can take a look. Unfortunately that means CPS workers who visit this place will also see the details of your case. Some of these workers are here to try to help and give perspectives from the agency point of view. Please treat them with respect. However there are some that will rat on you if you’re posting here. If that’s a concern for you, please use a fake name to register and be discrete about your personal details.
If you post anything on my message board advocating violence or illegal activities you can expect that it may be deleted as soon as I see it. This is not allowed here no matter how frustrated and distressed you’ve become.
Believe me - I UNDERSTAND YOUR PAIN AND I CARE - and hope you’ll find ideas on this site that will help your families to be reunited as quickly as possible.
If you have any other questions you feel should be answered in this FAQ please post them in the Suggestions area of the message forum.
Also, please do not miss reading the Legal Disclaimer and the Privacy Policy.
Linda Martin
Site Manager
Linda,
I am sorry but I have to correct your questions and answers. You appear to be operating your bias based on myths. I have a graduate education in child welfare and have worked reunifying families, and in child welfare policy for years.
CPS was not created because a bunch of social workers came together and said let’s kidnap children and destroy families. Your representatives in Congress ( I say you meaning yours personally and everybodys in the U.S.) passed laws and regulations, and then told the states to how to run the child welfare programs.
Child abuse/neglect is not only a crime. Criminal charges for child abuse have different requirements that allegations through the Welfare and Institutions Code (created by your representatives). Further, law enforcement does not have the training or resources to deal with abused children, administer social service programs, and refer to the appropriate therapeautic services. In fact, law enforcements view of what to do with parent’s accused of child abuse is much more severe than social workers.
If you don’t think so then ponder why child molestors are allowed to get raped/beat/murdered in prisons with prisonguards not looking.
Additionally, social workers do not get paid per child that is removed. I don’t know how that rumor got started, and unfortunately, miseducation about such an important system is detrimental to parents trying to get their children back.
The federal government provides some of the funding for local social services programs. Changes in federal law have shifted trends in how social services programs are administered. For example, for many years the funding was put primarily into family reunification. However, when families did not reunify (often due to a drug problem), the children would be left in the system. The federal government then shifted the focus to ensuring that permanent plans are in place for children, in addition to family reunificaton efforts.
Social workers and foster home parents are poor. Nobody is profitting off of this system. And although some social workers are not very good at what they do, nobody involved in the system at any level wants to see families seperated.
When you have to remove children from a parent that has raped and beat their child for years and who is threatening your life - we will see how pleasant you are. Social workers have to be tough sometimes in order to survive with severely mentally ill and abusive people.
If you don’t like the Welfare and Institutions Code,and the Family Code, then by all means write your representatives. However, distributing false information to parents who sincerely need help (or guilty parents who want to languish in anger rather than doing real work to get their child back) is irresponsible.
Thank you.
Comment by V — February 19, 2009 @ 3:33 pm
Talk about misinformation! You’ve got plenty!
1. You wrote “CPS was not created because a bunch of social workers came together and said let’s kidnap children and destroy families.”
I never said that. Do you honestly think I’m so stupid I don’t know about the federal laws? If so then you are the stupid one.
2. You wrote: “law enforcements view of what to do with parent’s accused of child abuse is much more severe than social workers.
If you don’t think so then ponder why child molestors are allowed to get raped/beat/murdered in prisons with prisonguards not looking.”
Since when are prison guards the same as law enforcement agents? LEOs operate on the penal code, and they are just as capable of discerning real child abuse as anyone. They are not, however, anxious to take children from their homes so that federal funding streams can start.
3. You wrote: “social workers do not get paid per child that is removed”
I never wrote that. Why are you accusing me of saying things I didn’t say? Don’t bother answering… due to your attitude and false allegations about what I actually wrote, I’m banning you from the site as soon as I finish writing this response. FYI - I don’t have time or patience to respond to daily disinformation postings to this site, so you’re not welcome here.
4. You wrote: “Social workers and foster home parents are poor. Nobody is profitting off of this system. And although some social workers are not very good at what they do, nobody involved in the system at any level wants to see families seperated.”
Such unbelievable ignorance is rarely seen. (a) you must not know what true poverty feels like; (b) social workers get paychecks and foster parents get payments too; (c) there are plenty of bad apples trying to destroy families by filing false statements in CPS court reports.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — February 20, 2009 @ 10:17 am
Quick follow up - the IP registered to “V” is banned from the site. If you see any more postings of this nature please email me directly to let me know.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — February 20, 2009 @ 10:40 am
Oh, don’t ban her. Let her keep talking.
Defamation and libel come to mind.
Talk on V and on and on and on. It is all a matter of record.
Comment by MaggieC — February 20, 2009 @ 8:04 pm
I am a former foster parent, but even so, I don’t agree with everything that social worker, or whatever “V” is. There are good workers out there (and they tend not to stay with the system very long). Parents appreciate them because they truly care. However, there are workers inside social services that do judge parents and are hell-bent on seeing particular families that cross their paths seperated. Some of those families do need to be seperated, let’s face it - some kids are objects to their parents and aren’t treated very well… but some of those families have been misjudged by high and mighty case workers who can’t spare the time to get their nose out of the clouds and take the time to get to know those families.
Foster parents are not paid, they are re-imbursed. There is a big difference there. Those who are in it for the money, and who use the stipend to make extra money, that means they are not providing for the kids that are in their care. Yes, those foster parents exist… and they give the good ones a bad name. A lot of times when you see foster parents with a lot of foster kids, that’s the case. They can use the stipend for 2-3 kids to take care of them all and then pocket the rest. Don’t get me wrong, there are families out there that are genuinely careing for multiple foster children, but it’s been my experience as a foster mom that this is a red flag. The foster parents that do care for the children often spend more than the state is willing to reimburse them for, and with most that’s ok. I know it was with us. I have not regretting spending one dime out of pocket for any child that has come through my door. I have made friends with many moms and dads who I was blessed to see re-united with their children. Most parents don’t go into the meetings and visitations in the beginning trying to like the foster parents, and I understand why. But these people appreciate knowing their kids are with people who not only care about their children, but treat them with respect too. Foster parents aren’t suppose to judge, and they aren’t suppose to treat these children like they belong to them. They are suppose to treat them the way that they would want their kids treated, and the same goes for the biological parents. I’ve never disrespected not one of my foster kids’ parents (and there have been some pretty abusive ones too - and that’s been hard — it’s hard to respect a parent who sexually or physicall abuses their child), but you do it for the child in those circumstances. One thing I have learned from being a foster parent, children will ALWAYS love their parents, even the abusive ones. When you treat the parents like trash or like dirt — you’re treating the child that way.
I didn’t mean to post such a long reply, but I wanted your readers to see it from a good foster parent’s perspective. There is no money to be made in foster care — if a foster parent is making money, that means the child is being neglected and doing without, and all a case worker or social services worker has to do is look and pay attention… if they can spare the time.
I am, btw, a former foster parent, because I cared too much and overstepped my boundaries trying to help a family remain in contact after the granddaughter was to be adopted.
Comment by LeishaV — February 20, 2009 @ 10:15 pm
I stumbled across this website by accident but did want to ask a question.
You stated that you believe children should not be abused but want CPS to be done away with….so what happens to the kids when they are abused and there isn’t a way to separate them from the situation???? leave them there? what if they were in a single parent home and no relatives wanted to take them…no CPS no foster care…what are the options then???
just curious
Comment by Dani — March 4, 2009 @ 10:54 pm
Dani, child abuse is a criminal matter. If a child is being abused, call a law enforcement officer. The abuser will be arrested and incarcerated. Now, isn’t that better than incarcerating the children in foster homes? Children can go live with their grandparents or other family members if their parents are in jail. Also they can be protected by courts giving legal guardianship to the relatives they go live with. CPS is a needless agency created by the federal government in violation of the tenth amendment, starting in 1973.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — March 5, 2009 @ 12:06 am
ok…but please accurately try to answer my final question I asked. In cases where no relative wants the child? Then what?
I may disagree with the philosophy of this site, but if there are good plans articulated for what to do with children in cases where there are no relatives willing or able…then it wouldn’t bother me that much.
(yes I am a speech therapist that works in the schools and I would protect my kids in a heartbeat…no agenda on MY part)
Thank you!
Comment by Dani — March 5, 2009 @ 10:40 pm
Dani, this is answered in the FAQ above, section three, last paragraph:
“My opinion, and the opinion of many other advocates and activists, is that CAPTA should be repealed. I believe CPS should be abolished, and in its place another foster-care-only agency should be established to take care of the very few children who are truly in need and without any fit extended family members able or willing to take them in.”
Comment by LindaJoMartin — March 6, 2009 @ 2:29 pm
Dear Linda
Thank you for your web-site. I’m one of those family members that was willing and able to take in a relatives child. I’ve had custody of my niece for 5.5 years now.
We currently are petitioning for adoption. However in our case the parents gave us custody.
However having custody and adoption are very different. In this state consent is needed by both parents.
I have had no contact from the natural mother. The natural father did give consent.
Because of this technical detail we may never get to adopt.
We have never requested money from the state. In our eyes this child is our child.
As far as CPS, I have seen them in action.
They lie and break their own laws, and codes of ethics. They twist truths and force families into un-needed, unwanted service plans, all the while dangling children over the heads of their parents.
We need reform. CPS must be help accountable for their actions and must have a “chain of command”. There must be someone watching over these mostly untrained, unskilled “so called” social workers that have the power to destroy families.
I have a friend that is a licensed clinical social worker, who work is in the field of psychology.
She feels that anyone wanting to work as a social worker, should have a masters degree in social work. and years of “life” experience.
Some of these “so called” social workers, are barely out of high school.
Do we want to trust the welfare and future of our families, to someone who lacks the knowledge and maturity needed to work in the very field in which they are working?
Comment by fran — March 11, 2009 @ 9:55 am
I found this site by accident but was glad I did!!! Thank You for being here & providing this information, it does help. In my quest here I was getting ready to write a complaint on 3 workers to the head of dhs, they were never there to help me they already had the foster family picked out no matter my pick for the next of kin placement my worker was for the foster parents who had no children, they didnt do their job while there may be some good ones out there they never were the ones I got!!!! Now then the counselor that was appointed to my children by dhs was sleeping with my EX-HUSBAND so everything went their way & its my beleif that everyone the workers, the DA, & the counselors knew about one another & waited until My rights were terminated & then now my EX-HUSBAND & THE COUNSELOR ARE NOW MARRIED & I HAVE AN INVESTIGATION GOING ON HER RIGHT NOW !!!!!!!!!!!!!! The Ok st health dept. because she has a license & I want jerked. You see I could never prove they were together before I lost my trial & the appeal time was up! Now then I wont stop until I’ve completed everyone who was involved with taking my rights & giving my children to strangers to adopt them now I do believe this has all been done on false pretenses, meaning the adotipons are illegal, & all my EX had to do was exactly what he did & she handed him anything he wanted some counselor she hated my son & he hated her so my ex & her take & ship my son off to a so called nanny will say & would leave him so they could go off & live their lives together now this woman has intials behind her name & handed my children over to other people because of her jealousy for me & my son!! Sorry cant live with that, so my mission is to REWRITE ALL THOSE INVOLVED A NEW RESUME FOR THEM BY THE TIME I’M DONE. they actually took all 4 of my children You dont mess with mother nature were very similar to the animals!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Thanks for listening & or reading Beware & watch your back remember if it doesnt feel right in your gut dont do it or let it be!!!!! May God bless you all & keep his angles around us & our children to protect them & to surround the evil who seeks us. Cristina
Comment by Cristina — March 12, 2009 @ 1:58 pm
There are so many parent victims advocating for their child victims, that I am wondering, utilizing a website such as this, can’t we bridge together physically by geographical locations to support each other in the court/dcs process? I am in SoCal/Inland Empire/SB County, and I would be willing to connect with anyone in this area to see if we can’t help each other in any way that we can!
Comment by Bleu — March 15, 2009 @ 9:54 am
My teen son was taken by dyfs and the judge finally returned him to me against the agency’s wished..infact my lawyer said they were so angry they lost, they were very very angry..why? maybe because they lost out on money..that’s the only thing that makes sense..they took my son because i had a depressed episode being bipolar but it only lasted a week, and they kept him for 4 months at my mom’s and then at a foster group home. I now plan to sue them for violating my constitutional rights in a federal court, but need a good lawyer to do this.
Comment by Susan Rubinstein — March 22, 2009 @ 8:18 pm
Does anyone know how long time it should take for the administrative law judge to answer? I’ve been waiting for 4 months now.
It would be nice to have some timeframes somewhere. I tried to look up the state’s website. They did not answer to this one.
Comment by Michiganian — March 23, 2009 @ 9:31 am
Michiganian, have you tried calling the state’s hearings department to ask? I think this is one of those things that would be different in every state.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — March 23, 2009 @ 10:51 am
Susan, try going to the federal courthouse and looking through other cases that have been filed against CPS. Find out what lawyers did it successfully, and contact them.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — March 23, 2009 @ 10:54 am
V is just tipical of the crap CPS says. I just lost my child because she wants to stay with her Grandpa. She made up all kids of lies. We had her in the hospitail and they wanted her in a residental treatment program and we did too. However, they went in and interviewed her in the hosp and took her out. Our attorney told us to just sign over custody because we aren’t going to get her back and it is the only way to keep CPS off our back. He said if we fight it, he can swear we will lose because the Judge likes CPS and trusts them. Plus the law doesn’t even require CPS to prove anything happen, just that it could have happened. We are gooing to sue after it is over and they are off our backs. Seems the only way we can win. Of course, the whole family has been destroyed. Crazy
Comment by Marv — March 25, 2009 @ 11:03 pm
Linda’s comment outrages me!! Who cares if someone passes a law, if they do not enact any oversight or governance over these laws why does it matter???? I have contacted the President, the Govenor, and several Senators and Congressmen. I receive the same response,”We have no oversight over CPS”.
I can go on and on. Visit my website.. http://www.whoprotectsthefamily.com to see the obstacles that myself and other families have encountered.
Comment by CPSMom — March 30, 2009 @ 9:55 pm
CPSMom… exactly what was it that I wrote that outraged you?
Comment by LindaJoMartin — March 30, 2009 @ 10:46 pm
Michiganian,
The time limit is generally governed by statute. Try looking at the Michigan statutes most likely filed under Social Service Laws or something of that nature.
Comment by MaggieC — March 31, 2009 @ 4:26 am
can cps take your for smoking in the house
Comment by jennifer jesttes — March 31, 2009 @ 8:07 am
Yes and no.
Comment by MaggieC — March 31, 2009 @ 9:16 pm
Jennifer… CPS caseworkers can take your child for anything they think they can build a case on. I’ve never heard of anyone’s child being taken for just this one reason, but I wouldn’t put it past them. I’ve heard of children taken for vegan diets, sunburns, and overweight. And I’ve been suspecting for several years that the smoking issue would become a CPS issue too. All they need to do is to convince a judge that your children would be better off in foster homes.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — March 31, 2009 @ 11:10 pm
This type of thing worries the hell out of me.
I would put money on the thought that my mom would try to have cps take my son away.
But in the state of Texas, grandparents have no rights.
She’s already told people I drank and did drugs during my pregnancy.Now she’s telling people that I beat my son.
I’m waiting for the day CPS shows up at my house..
Just waiting.
Comment by Mitch — April 20, 2009 @ 1:21 pm
I hope that never happens to you, Mitch. If you can’t trust your family members, maybe it is time to break off all contact with them.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — April 20, 2009 @ 10:32 pm
This is for the comment relating to San Bernardino/ inland empire- e-mail me at me.vs.cps at gmail.com. I would love to be there with you or just talk about your experience. I dealt with rancho cucamonga cps & the San Bernardino juvenile dependency court, & lost my kids due to completely false allegations of emotional abuse. Something is definately not right.
Comment by D — April 25, 2009 @ 11:21 pm
Family members unfourtunatley are sometimes your worst enemy.
I recently lost my kids twice for a period of over two years, I have 4 children under the age of 5. It was due to my husbands abuse and drug abuse.
However, the best thing that I have learned is do not talk to them, maje them take you into court and lawyer up. You are under NO OBLIGATION to have to speak to them or take any drug test or explain anything to them. Do not let yourself be fooled by the coersion. ANd belive me, I have one of the best after me right now. I had them pull my 5 yearold kidergartener out of her class in elementary school and there is nothing I can do about it. Supposedly they recieved a call into their “HOTLINE” and have re-opened the investigation. But I know I am clean and right so all I can do is NOT TALK TO THEM. Please do not make the same mistakes that I have and put your innocent children through needless suffering.
Comment by Brandi R — May 1, 2009 @ 6:51 am
well lets see i lost my kids based on false accusation. that is what cps told me in the meeting room they plain out said we are tired of hearing about you so we are doing some thing about it. they told me i was only allowed to have to of my kids live with me i have 5 kids. how can they tell a mother that. they made me sign soul custody over of my two of my kids to there dad talk about ripping out my heart. my family was destroyed how can they do that to kids and a mother. i lost my mind was depressed my kids don’t understand it has been almost to years i lost my kids in 2007. my daughter did not want to live with her dad she wanted to live with me. cps made me walk her over and hand her to her dad right along with my son. when i went to court my kids dad lied right along with his parents saying my kids never lived with me. they told such lies how i lost my kids was the worst part. please tell me if i was to blame. my kids dad the father to my two middle kids i was staying with him getting ready to get in to my own place i thought that was nice of him. any way i was wrong one day my friend told me to let her know when i arrived back to the apartments i went to a bbq later that day. well my kids were playing and being good my friend lived in the same apartment complex so it’s not like i went far. i asked him if he would keep an eye on on my youngest he has watched my kids before for me willing lee to. this time was so different of course he said yes he would watch her. she was playing with her sister and did not want to go with me. i was only gone a few minutes and let me tell in that amount of time things can go wrong. my youngest daughter had got in to the butter so my kids dad beat her really bad mind you it was worst then a spanking. when i walked back through the doors she was in her car seat screaming i was terrified seeing my daughter like that i asked what happened he told me. i grabbed my little girl and went back over to my friends it was then when i realized she had markings on her he left hand prints she was marked from the middle of her back to her ankles i was furious how could some one do that to a little girl. i called the police when they sowed up they took pictures of her then went over to talk to him they were going to arrested him,but instead he turned it around on me and said it was my fault or something because the next thing i knew he was not going to jail and the police had to call cps. i was so upset it took me an hour and a half to calm my little girl down so i took her up to the hospital and got her checked out to my surprise she had deep bruise contusions i started to break down and cry. when cps showed up the next day they talked to me then my kids dad whatever he said to them it got flipped around on me it was my fault they said my kids dad did nothing wrong. the next thing i knew i had an open case with cps. that broke my heart he had got away with hurting my little girl. when we went to court things just got worse they did not hear me they just heard i guess what they wanted to hear. i ended up getting all my kids at first with me then too month’s later my middle to kids got ripped away from me. what happened to justice what happened to kids being heard i mean come on not all kids lie my son seen what happened to his little sister they did not believe him though they said little kids take things and stretch it out to some thing it is not. don’t trust any one some times you can’t even trust the police who are suppose to be there and protect you. where were they to protect my little girl from getting beat by a guy who is 6′feet tall. i tell you what is the world coming to. thank you letting me get this of my chest. my life has not been the same and neither has my kids.
Comment by wendy cloinger — May 3, 2009 @ 7:50 am
CPS has done a wonderful job of allowing our troubled and drug addicted teen to make false allegations of abuse. They then graciously allowed him to run wild until he became so out of control that they were finally forced to try to rein him in. So he ran away, and has been missing for months. Great job CPS…btw see you in court.
Comment by Cu' — May 15, 2009 @ 1:34 pm
Funny, there seems to be a clear dichotomy here. Folks that lose their kids due to false accusations seem to support the site, while the nazis that advocate unnecessary government intervention are all for CPS. Hmmm. What that tells me is that a lot of loving families are being harmed and or destroyed, while the “workers” are all about “investigations”. CPS is a completely unnecessary agency. Abuse is a CRIME, call a freaking cop if you see it. All I have EVER seen CPS used for is to give a big hassle to people you don’t like. For example, ex girlfriends/boyfriends, new step parents, noisy neighbors, etc. I have NEVER seen CPS useful in any capacity, and I have been a nurse for 9 years. So, CPS, get over yourselves, and prepare to get a real job. Progress is inevitable, and your “agency” will eventually become a thing of the past, a distant, tragic memory of traumas past. And families dealing with them, I hope you find help to deal with those creeps before you lose your children. God bless-
Comment by kari hill — May 20, 2009 @ 4:35 pm
Oh, sorry to repost so quickly, but another idiotic statment caught my eye and I couldnt resist. “No CPS no foster care”? Were you hit in the head? Um, there were orphanages and “foster care” since the dawn of time, called by one name or another. They are even mentioned in the Bible. “Ye shall not afflict the widow or fatherless child - That is, ye shall comfort and assist them, and be ready upon all occasions to shew them kindness.” Exodus 22:22
“God defends the cause of the fatherless, widow and orphan. We are to love the strangers and fear the Lord” Deuteronomy 10:18
Foster care can continue to exist by another name, without the moronic interference of caseworkers.
Comment by kari hill — May 20, 2009 @ 4:45 pm
my friend ask me if i can watch his kidsi told him i had to call my friend to watch my kids but she left them there by them self . the cop show up there and i what down to my house because here faimily was there i was not arrest and childern youth seriver ever show up in till the courthearing in dec 17 thay took my kids . thay have lie use my disabilty to take your kids away and thay threathen to put your kids up for adoption . i did every thing thay ask of me thay will not give me thay back . we are sue the and thay put my daughter up for a adoption. my case worker is my baby father old casewoker and some one else casewoker.
Comment by isabel — May 29, 2009 @ 10:30 am
It’s unfortunate that children are threatening their parents with calling CPS on them. Seems like each generation of kids gets worse and worse. In my day I would never think to swear or say some of the nasty things to my parents as some kids today do. And if I did I would get disciplined for my actions. Now the kids think they can get away with it if you try and discipline them they will threaten you with a call into CPS or the police making false accusations that you hit or abused them and then intentially bruise up themselves.. Here we provide for these children to live under our great home, give them what they need but have the audacity to use CPS threats on us. Kids lie now to get their way and CPS tends to believe every word the kids say without even listening to your side. CPS stay out of it you are not above the court as you say you are
Comment by Against CPS — May 30, 2009 @ 7:42 am
My Granddaughter was removed from my daughter for a reason. My daughter has done everything they want her to do. I am so frustrated because the social worker is acting like a control freak. The worst part about this is I work with this social worker I am a counselor who actually helps families get their children back. I have seen parents who shouldn’t and parents who should get their children back. I have been on both ends and that’s why I do what I do. Since I work in this field I am afraid to say anything although I will. I looked on this site for legal answers something I could stand on when I talk to her. I went on here to find out what my daughter’s rights are is there any rules to this. I should know, but I don’t all I know is that it is primarily always been up to the social workers what has happened. The social worker told my daughter that although she’s doing what she is supposed to do that she probably won’t get her daughter back until over a year and the baby is getting so used to her Grandma that in the end it will be so hard for her. The social worker is running the way the Grandma parents my Granddaughter and is making controlling comments such as,” it’s up to me where that baby goes.” This is so unnecessary and it’s tearing my daughter apart. This particular social worker treats people as if they are so much lower than she is and this is not right. I will probably loss my job for fighting this, but I have to do something and I do need some words of wisdom if anyone can offer it…Thanks
Comment by P — May 30, 2009 @ 8:27 pm
P.S. I have known some very good social workers and soem very bad ones to. Their are a few that work harder than the parents on getting the children back into the home. Unfortunately there are many horror stories I have some of my own. It is very hard to call though the police actually are the ones who make the most CPS reports of anyone I know. They just don’t want to deal with it so they call in the social workers true story…So with that it is sad that anyone would hurt their children so that something like this would have to exist. So when the police arrests the family and their is no one else around to watch the child which i’ve seen then foster homes are necessary. I do agree social workers have way to much power and control over children by far and that is my dilema.
Comment by P — May 30, 2009 @ 8:38 pm
Our safe world./life has been attacked by false accusations with CPS. They have my grandchildren in foster care now. I asked CPS if I could take the children into my care. At the suggestion of the judge my household has had our background checks and have done what is asked of us. The assesment worker told me that after we started the checks and before they came back her superviisor decided that because I am close with my son it would not be in the best interest for me to have the children live with me. I have been leaving messages everyday for 3 weeks for this supervisor so I could explain to her that I know I would not be able to communicate with my son while I had the kids and I am prepared to do that. Keeping my grandbabies with the family is my main concern and objective. Does anyone have any ideas on how I can actually reach this supervisor? Or what else I can do since she doesn’t have the decencey to return my calls.
Comment by Tina Hurstel — May 31, 2009 @ 8:32 am
Dear P;
Bravo to you and kudos:
Few case workers know the rules. (Bingo, you win the prize!!)
BTW, many of the employees are not degreed social workers. Often the term *case worker* is more accurate. An art history major may take over a year to get up to speed. And CPS apparently runs few trainings. This, in itself, may be a violation of the child’s the family’s civil rights.
This in itself could be litigated point, since CPS can sever the most fundamental right accorded to parents–the rights to mother & father w/o excessive government interference.
CPS= CIVIL rights violators, often.
One very accessible site is:
http://www.familyrights.us
Len has lots of very useful info there. It is a GOLD MINE OF INFO.
Different than this site, but both Linda and Leonard know and respect each other’s approach to taming and holding CPS accountable.
Keep reading. Join the Chat room ( Message Boards here)
Perhaps you can see why innocent parents are so distressed at the conduct and oversight of CPS agencies in the US.
It is truly a disaster!
Best. F.
Comment by fern — May 31, 2009 @ 6:33 pm
Tina, I would write and/or go see my state legislator to request help in reasoning with the agency. Also the county supervisor and … if all else fails, I’d file a request for an administrative hearing.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — June 1, 2009 @ 7:22 am
Tina, Find the nearest agency in your area that can advocate for you. Call the CPS office anonymously and tell them you are looking for parenting services and call down the list and let them know what you are going through. I have worked with Grandparents fighting to get their Grandchildren before they receive our counseling services and we advocate for them. This particular Grandmother had to get and attorney usually the attorney for the parent on the case can be contacted about this and actually help you. I’m so sorry to hear that it’s such crap and part of the reason I now feel the way I do about CPS. I’m a Grandparent who couldn’t get my Granddaughter because 15 years ago (I was 24) their were CPS reports the crazy thing is they all happened when I was in treatment getting help and it was Grandparents fighting between eachother and had nothing to do with me. The crazyiest thing is I teach parenting and I am a counselor and advocate for parents, but I can’t take care of my own Granddaughter. Keep fighting I will not give up as a matter of fact I will get an attorney I will find a way to clear my name and I will not give up and you don’t either…!
Comment by P — June 3, 2009 @ 6:53 am
My kids were taken due to substance abuse. This I was doing even though I took care not to let my children see. I’m kind of wondering what more hurdles I have to jump. Parenting class is over in just 3 wks and I do random drug screens which I have passed though they have only sent me for 3 (Ive asked to be sent once a wk or more) , take substance abuse sessions and do individual therapy, I keep visits timely and usually the kids are late, I only get supervised visitation and just now getting to 2 hours, I have a 8 yr old son, a 7 yr old daughter and a 2 yr old daughter, with summer here and all the work I’m doing I’ve asked about better visitation such as at the great-grandparents home where the older 2 are and the fathers home where my youngest is… I was turned down for that and also turned down for unsupervised visits in any way…. What more do I do???
Comment by Angel — June 3, 2009 @ 2:52 pm
By the way in Ky and e-mail is wasyoursnowgone at aol.com
Comment by Angel — June 3, 2009 @ 2:52 pm
Cool!
Comment by Anton — June 3, 2009 @ 8:52 pm
Here’s a good one for you,I took my children to school one morning,and I pulled up to the school and I opened theslider of our van to let them out…The slider opened on the side facing the school,my 6 year old was throwing his tantrum about his shoes not being tight(it;s a sensory thing)and I was patting him on his head to motivate him to get him out of the van so he would’nt miss breakfast…the school staff thought they seen me punching my child in the back…he went into the school crying,they thought they were going to take pictures of my childs back,guess what there was nothing their to take pictures of…they called cps anyway,knowing they had no proof of nothing…because of the accusations I will have a child abuse record for the rest of my life…which means that I won’t be able to go on field trips with my child…I pulled my children out of that school….makes me wonder if my children are safe to go to a public school…my wife has been brought up in foster care most of her life,and cps is going to use her past to use against her…that;s sad when that;s all they got on a person….how ridicules is that…
Comment by Lonnie vas — June 4, 2009 @ 6:55 pm
Lonnie, It’s because of stories like yours I have lost faith in this system. A girl I worked with recently told me that the state of California has a warped system. She has worked with CPS in other states and has seen nothing like the one here in California. I know its bad all over, but here it gets so out of hand.
Comment by P — June 13, 2009 @ 10:15 am
FYI for those who still have their children. You never know when someone will report you. You may show up at daycare or school one day only to find your children gone. You protect your family every time you get in your car by making sure everyone is strapped in safely because you never know when you might have an accident. Protect your children and yourself from CPS, just in case.
You can write a document stating that no school, city, county, state, or law enforcement employee may question or converse with your child about anything or anyone beyond the scope of school related education. Nobody has permission to remove your child from class for anything other than a school related issue and even then, that person must be a school employee performing in the scope of their job duties.
If anyone should come to or call the school requesting to speak to or see your child, you require the school to get their name, title, agency and phone number and call you with this information before the end of business on the day contact is made. State that this letter is in effect from (date) until (last day of school). You demand the school principal to ensure all office personnel be aware of the requirements stated herein and ensure all personnel abide by the requirements.
Be sure to put that a copy of this letter is to be kept in the child’s school file. Get the principals signature on it and have it witnessed by a notary. Do this every school year. Do a separate one for each child.
Educate your kids about not answering questions that aren’t about school. Give them a laminated statement that says My child’s name is (name). I forbid you to speak to/with my child and demand you call me immediately. My child has been told not to speak with you and to call me right away. Put in their lunchbox, purse, wallet, pocket or on a string. Make sure they carry it at all times.
CPS always brings a cop. It’s for their own protection. They never know if a parent will attack. CPS is there only to investigate an anonymous tip. Here’s how they trick you. There is no warrant or court order. The TPN they hand you is not a legal document. A warrant or court order for removal is a legal document from a court of law. It must have the state seal, judges signature and be notarized. In other words, when they ask if they can come in SAY NO go outside. If they say they have to see the house, ask for the warrant.
If they want to see your kids tell them, you are busy right now and you can set an appointment for them. (they make you set appointments don’t they?) Inform them that they will only have permission to see the children. Any questions they have must be submitted to you in writing 3 days in advance so you can confer with an attorney. Then politely excuse yourself. Do not answer any questions. You may just frustrate them enough with your legal knowledge that they won’t want to come back.
Good luck all. I lost 3 court cases and 6 grandkids before I learned any of this. I miss them all very much.
Comment by Robin — June 23, 2009 @ 1:49 am
I am a registered nurse in the state of California - and in the midst of a hostile custody battle with a 5 time convicted violent criminal. We have been divorced for 7 years and for the past 2 1/2 years I have been subjected to the harassment of this criminal via CPS. The ex calls CPS, my job, my neighbors, friends, and the Board of Registered Nursing routinely to falsely accuse me of child abuse. I have survived 5 full “investigations” by CPS, two of which law enforcement actually supported me that there was NO EVIDENCE of any abuse.
There is documented timelines that the false accusations come from the ex and his new wife EVERY time we are in court over child support and/or visitation. My oldest son was convinced by this psychopath to claim I “beat him” - no bruises or injuries of course - to obtain a new motorcycle. The abuse of the system by this jerk finally forced me to send my eldest son - who would stand in my face and say “my dad told me that he wants me to live with him and you are a stupid b&*%h” - I finally sent him to live with his dad..which he loathes…now a year later my youngest son is falling victim to his fathers coersion.
CPS now at my house again acting “empathetic” that they have to investigate me again…no EVIDENCE, of course. I finally told them I am no longer going to participate in this obviously fabricated situation - I will likely lose custody of my youngest son over it -where is the justice for me???? AND FOR MY CHILDREN??? My children, my life, my professional license (which is how I support my children) and my very freedom in jeopardy - I’m on the verge of giving up…is there ever any recourse against these incessant false filings? Please, any suggestions are welcomed. Before it’s over with, I will be forced to send both my children to this sociopaths custody and will be paying him child support - not to mention my son’s are being victimized to make false accusations against their own mother to please their “dad”…please help!!
Comment by Michelle — July 1, 2009 @ 11:20 am
Phooey on child predatory social work ‘V’, she has NO idea how CPS destroys innocent families!
PLEASE, can someone offer information on to go about appealing a family court ruling in Arizona? My niece has just lost a two plus years battle with CPS and Family Court has awarded the alcoholic father full custody.
Please help, we have no idea how to appeal in Arizona.
Thank you all and Linda, THANK YOU FOR THIS SITE! God bless all of you on this site seeking help!
Comment by Dee-Dee — July 17, 2009 @ 8:08 pm
Dee-Dee, so sorry your case ended badly! I don’t know how to appeal in AZ… I’d start by asking the court appointed lawyer and the county clerk. As I understand it the appeal has to start within a few days. Doesn’t the court appointed lawyer have to file for it?
Comment by LindaJoMartin — July 18, 2009 @ 3:04 pm
One of the biggest problems with CPS is because they are into self regulation. Filing appeals, etc are never going to work against them because it would require them admitting there is some wrong doing on their part and they aren’t going to do that.
I made the mistake of filing some complaints in Tennessee and quickly realized it was useless. I filed complaints to nine or ten places and every single one of them ended up being forwarded to the SAME office.
The only thing you can do is hire a good attorney. I have learned in the state of Tennessee there are SEVEN cases in the TN Supreme Court. If I had the means there would be eight.
I now consider myself an advocate for the falsely accused especially loving fathers. In Tennessee, there was a recent report complaining how few fathers are involved in their children’s lives etc. Well did it ever occur to the mental midgets we have running our state that many loving fathers back off because the legal system does nothing to help us?
Comment by Dustin — July 18, 2009 @ 5:00 pm
treli mustafa of dcf, stole my baby of two months. she took my baby from a hotel room near the airport, as i was leaving to go back to my home in MA the next day. treli mustafa took my baby to a hospital where she received a well child, healthy baby check up. treli lied and told me that my baby was perfect, healthy, happy and that she was brining my baby right back. she told me she was going to put me in jail if i didnt tell her the name of my baby’s father. they stole my baby of two months and tore my heart apart! my baby was stolen by the dcf and they are all abusers of poweer and they do not care about the fact they have deprived my baby of my breastmilk and my love and nurture. god knows the truth and the truth is dcf are all liars and abusers of power!
Comment by kristy kozaka — July 20, 2009 @ 3:50 pm
I am a grandmother that hurts everyday for her daughter. My daughter is an excellent mother to my only granddaughter and only grandchild. My daughter has suffered in the past from a mental disability. She received treatment and now the doctor’s don’t find her enough depressed, so therefore they will not prescribe medication. To me, this tells me that she is doing great.
The sorry ex-son-in-law constantly is threatening to take her back to court to fight for custody of my granddaughter. Why do parents think that children cannot think for themselves nor have opinions. Every time that my granddaughter for example will tell her father that she does not want to live with him, he turns around and accuses my daughter of putting this in her head. My granddaughter is a very bright and intelligent child.
Since her divorce, no matter where she moves, we can count on CPS showing up. Someone is always calling and filing false accusations. This has been going non-stop for over a year. CPS has interviewed my granddaughter, to the point of making her cry. No child should be put through this experience. I am not saying children don’t lie, but normally children are innocent and will tell the truth. She has dealt with CPS workers that from the beginning immediately categorize her as one of the same bad parents that they deal on a day to day basis. I or anyone can call on a daily basis, lie, ruin someone’s life and this is OK. I have seen a case worker that has stated that a parent must have a living room, a dining room… so that the children are not removed from a loving home. Tell me what furniture except for a bed has to do with how a child is raised.
To me, this is taking it personal and if a parent makes a statement to this effect, they end up in jail because of the power hungry CPS worker. Something needs to get done, so that CPS does not have the authority to just accuse a parent without substantiated proof.
There are some good CPS workers but the bad ones out weigh the good ones. They go on this power trip, that they can hold someone’s life in their hands. I have seen CPS workers take their jobs to extreme where they are harassing an of course this is within their rights. This needs to stop.
I am sure when the laws were created, they were created to protect the children from some bad parents, because we do have some bad parents, but please don’t categorize all parents as bad parents. There are many reasons why people will make false accusations, going through a divorce, not wanting to pay child support, being jealous, mad at the person, owing money to them and list can go on and on. A person on death row has more rights than a parent working with CPS.
In the eyes of the court, you are innocent until proven guilty and in the eyes of CPS you are guilty until proven innocent. But how can you prove you are innocent, if they only believe whoever files the complaint. If the court would follow-up on those persons filing a complaint and turn the tables around to file charges against them if the filed accusations are false, we would have a better system. If an anonymous call is placed, yes investigate, but if the charge in not substantiated, please close out the case and allow the family to move on, but no, again the power hungry CPS worker starts their harassment trail.
Enough is enough. No one is perfect and I strongly feel that most CPS workers only become a CPS worker because they cannot find a job anywhere else and again don’t take me wrong because there are some very good CPS, but they don’t last long and burn out too quick. Parents and grandparents need to unite and let their legislators and the courts know that it is time for them to get off their behinds with not wanting to get involved and do their jobs. They took an oath to service their constituents, so serve. Just simpling saying, we do not oversee CPS, is not the answer and we should not allow them to get away with it.
My daughter is trying so hard to better herself by trying to get a higher education and just because the ex and his family feel that she should not be doing this, they try their hardest to bring her down every chance they get and it is possible that they are the one’s doing this.
Families we must unite and make our government aware of all of the injustice that is going on and it must be stopped!
Cookie - Ohio
Comment by Cookie — July 21, 2009 @ 3:31 am
@ robin
I am a cps investigator. I understand your pain. I do however want everyone to know that a school cannot stop cps from interviewing ones child. The law forces school officials to allow cps to interview your child. This law is in effect for multiple reasons.
If someone wants to tell their children to not talk to cps, that is their right, however the school has to allow it by law.
Comment by mike — July 26, 2009 @ 12:26 pm
My husband left me for a 20 years old at work.
Now he has my kids and will not let me have them back, calling CPS on me several times when I was drug tested negative. How do I get my kids back? I have no money for a lawyer.
Comment by amy Brady — July 29, 2009 @ 2:22 pm
How do you find this site on accident? I have only had CPS called on me in the past, from people that are jealous, with pride, careless, hateful, angry, relentless, indictive, hypicritical, envious, retarded, judgemental, delusional, demented people. Those times left unfounded. One social worker, was in fact a hater, spent ten minutes at my place and made her opinion @ the time I lived in a hotel ( I moved new owners took over our rental house) in between moves was in hotel, kids had to go to school, school judged me poorly, Social worker just totally wrong. I have had my children all three over nine years now, I am 27 years old, They had never been to the E.R never had any accidents, straight a students, etc…. I am young so I see the misunderstanding. Judge not lest ye be judged, and you are not God How can you judge someone from twenty minutes yet ye has not known thee thy whole life. Ugh so now my sister has called them, she has lost one of hers. I will not go into depth to compare the two of us just know she has no room to talk, just over the years she has hurt me like no other and this is just one example, another is that I came to live with her and she put me and my children in a shelter becuase I would not work at her prior job (stripping) I could not. So the things I said about the people who intend on calling cps to ruin someones life are first those who are in fact all of the above.
Comment by kristy — July 30, 2009 @ 4:36 am
the first time i had some dealing with cps is when thay came to my shop to tell darby reyes mother that her child was dead due to a auto acident where he was not buckled in after his name was allready on the news his mother had problem right were they trying to kill her too the foster care taker should have not hauled the child around like cargo in back of suv
who checks on foster fam
Comment by larry in va — July 31, 2009 @ 12:05 am
i have a friend that has a false claim against him. there are two kids in house. what should be done? cps wants to come out tomorrow.
Comment by larry in va — July 31, 2009 @ 12:09 am
Amy, for feedback on your case please register at our message board. It sounds like you’re going to need a lot of help. This may involve you going to court on your own without a lawyer.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — July 31, 2009 @ 6:37 am
Larry in VA - see What to Do if CPS Agents Are Investigating You.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — July 31, 2009 @ 6:57 am
Hi my name is Cheyenne. A woman and a police man took me and my brother away from my mom and dad and they won’t tell us why. Now we have to live with my Gram and another woman said we will get a new family soon. My Gram said my mom and dad don’t love us anymore and they don’t want us but I don’t believe her. We get to see my mom and dad on Saturday for four hours and they come every week no matter what. I think my Gram is upset because my mom and dad got divorced and she is making CPS give us to her instead of letting us stay with mom and dad. Nobody will listen to us and they won’t even let us talk to my mom and dad except when they come on Saturday. I don’t want to go to a new family and my brother doesn’t want to either. We want to go home with my mom and dad and no one will let us. I tried to call a layer but everytime I call they say I am to young and I can’t get a lawyer myself. I tried to sign up for the messageboard but I can’t get in there either. I really need help please!! We just want to go back home to my mom and dad. I know they are divorced but I don’t think that is a reason for us to not be allowed to see them anymore. Please. My Gram is gone for the whole day today and my brother and I are here alone so I can only talk on the computer today. She will be back tomorrow morning and then I do not know when I will be able to talk again. She does not allow us to talk on the computer or the phone and she took the cord for the phone with her. But my brother figured out how to make the computer work even though she had a password on it. We need help please so we can get out of Gram’s house and go back home please!!!!
Comment by Cheyenne — August 20, 2009 @ 9:55 am
Ok where do you find success stories of parents getting their kids back?? And the details.
Comment by Lisa Kaneck — August 25, 2009 @ 7:58 am
We had a fallout with our builder and realtor. Good friend’s of the builder and realtor live in our neighborhood and has called CPS on us last summer with in a three weeks of moving into our house. The complaints were unfounded. We also received complaints through our association with in two weeks of moving into a new house with no yard yet. This year we received complaints from our association and another complaint through CPS. I now have CPS in my home five days a week some days and some evenings and a separate worker coming out once or twice a month. I am having a difficult time being gracious. I also have a nurse coming out once a month from last summer’s call. I tried to tell DFS this increases my duties. They think I am paranoid about being harassed.Today, the harasser drove by and I was in my house for a few seconds to retreive some CPS paper work for me to fill out. She drove by while I was watching my children and the whitel SU driving by from a window about to go outside to tend to my kids. I cannot control who calls and complains about us. Our worker says if there are more complaints of unsupervised children the children maybe taken from the home My family is being harassed and watched daily. I have now decided to keep my three children four and under in the house all day since my part of my back yard can be seen from the road as well. I have two teenage boys whom one of them was not watching the properly having my two year old outside alone. A fleeting thought that CPS would eventually be at my door came to mind as I was driving up These neighbors do not like us because of what happened during the building process with their broker an builder friends. When we complained during this process we met with much retaliation. As long as this neighbor lives in our neighborhood there will be no rest for us. Our priest suggested we pray for healing of the three families possibly four who have been harassing us. Satan is using their wounds to lash out at my family. One of my social workers grew up Catholic. I don’t h ave much time to pray a formal novena for a saint to pull a miracle during the day or go to adoration on my own to resolve these issues. Maybe i will ask for free baby sitting so I can go to 24 hour adoration of Jesus to resolve this in a pinch and to have one of my social workers to pray with me to stop the harassment and to convert the harassers.
Comment by Deann — August 26, 2009 @ 12:14 am
Lisa, you can find some success stories on the message forum in the “Happy Endings” section.
Comment by LindaJoMartin — August 27, 2009 @ 12:25 am
First of all, let me say that I volunteer for CASA where I live and work with children who are legitimately abused, in fact, I look over my cases and refuse to accept one with “questionable” findings or findings over religion or culture or even things that could have been handled with services while the children were in the home. I am known as the one who takes the “worst of the worst” and I know that there are bad social workers, I amworking with one right now. I am using just initials to protect my positions, because I care about the kids i work with and because I have an interesting story to tell, that although it was dismissed, I would rather not be known where I live…(even those who work in child advocacy are not above CPS torture and the anonymous caller system)
In December 2005, my husband was deployed to Iraq and his best friend was due to leave in six months, to save on rent he moved into our home and thank god he did, because in February of 2006 I became violently ill and had an emergency surgery after a week of not knowing what was wrong. During that surgery they found out I needed a complete hysterectomy (at age 27) in the near future. My husband’s buddy is a registered nurse, so for that period of time I was well taken care of and so were my two youngest children (I share custody of my two older children and they do school with their dad to keep them from having to move all over the country, my younger two were not in school at this time). In April of 2006, my husband’s buddy’s deployment was imminent, and over concern for my upcoming surgery he encouraged me to befriend the wife of another friend of his and we hit it off immediately. We spent a lot of time together over the next few months and when at the end of August 2006 I had to have my surgery, she took care of my kids, made sure they got to their pre-school programs and helped me through a dangerous, life-threatening surgical complication ( my one day stay in the hospital turned into six and I was sent home sick). During this time the Army refused to send my husband home and I gave her a limited POA to care for the children, I did what I thought was best. I went home from the hospital to her home. As we were leaving the hospital, a nurse told this woman I was being a wimp and should be better within 48 hours. Mind you, I went home with an infection, one day after three blood transfusions and with a severe reaction to several medications. I had also had two previous C-Sections and they used the same scar to open me up, which increases pain. From that moment on, things changed.
After 2 days this woman informed me I needed to walk my daughter to school, which I did, but barely made it. The next day I left her home and went home. Two weeks later we had to pick up the wife of a friend of my husband’s in another state. I was still in a drug fog and still very weak. I received a large check the day before this check which I cashed and this woman took the money. Like I said, I was in no position to argue, I barely knew what was going on. I never saw a dime of that money.
A week after we returned, my daughter came home from school with a large bruise near her eye. I called the school and they informed me that a little boy in her class had accidentally hit her with a block in class and it was documented. At midnight that night, CPS and a police officer came to my home to interview me and the kids over this bruise and that someone had reported I had dragged my child home by the arm that day (funny, I didn’t pick her up that day, a nice assistant at the school brought her to me as I lived across the street and could not yet drive). I, still recovering and actually feeling worse, let them in. I will admit to the following:
My house was a disaster. I had had two surgeries in less than six months and was deathly ill in between. My dryer had broken while I was in the hospital and I could not afford to fix it. I did the bare minimum to keep my house livable and did the best I could.
At this time, I called the woman who had helped me and she spoke to the social worker and told her the situation and then they left. The social worker have instructions to this woman to assist me as much as she could and that she would be back in two weeks. I said fine and put my kids back to bed. I spent two weeks cleaning the house top to bottom (no help from the other woman). Split my incision open, missed my follow up appointment for my surgery, and asked the school if they called, they said no. During this time I also begged the Army to send my husband home. I also began to distance myself from this woman who was my “friend” I was coming out of my fog after surgery and things were not adding up.
The day of the two -week follow up, the SW called and said it would be at least another week as my case was a minor thing that was going to be unfounded. The other woman was there when this call came in. I went to the doctor that day to see about my open incision and it was recommended that I allow my younger child to stay at a friend’s home overnight as I would be on pain meds and antibiotics and she was well, barely three and a challenge. I allowed her to stay at this woman’s house against my better judgement to allow me to rest for the one night.
The next day was the worst day of my life. I have been through military deployments, my husband’s disability, my divorce from my first husband, etc etc and still, this was the worst. At 1:15 or so pm I received a text from this woman stating that she had both of my children. School was out in 10 minutes so I wondered why and where she would have my older daughter, who should have been in pre-school. I went over to the school and asked why I had not been informed she was taken out early and was told there was no need to inform me, she was on the pick-up list. I asked if they thought it was strange that my daughter, who had never missed one day of class would leave early, they said yes, but policy states they cannot questions pick-ups from authorized individuals. I called the woman who had my children and she would not tell me where they were. I went to a neighbors and she called the woman while I called the police. The neighbor was told my children were at the laundry mat and that myself and my husband knew where they were. My husband was in IRAQ how would he know where they were???? The police refused to help me stating that with a POA for in case (ONLY) I was unable to care for my children I had essentially given up my parental rights. I then called my husband’s nit and dispatched an immediate emergency message to Iraq. Then I called social work on post (Total time children missing at this point, over three hours) and found out my children were at the hospital on post getting examined for sexual assault….BY ME! I was in shock and demanded that this woman and the friend she had with her be stopped immediately and my children removed. I was told she could do with my children whatever she wanted and the police were on their way.
14 hours, not as long as some of the parent son here, but 14 hours I was missing my children. They were kidnapped and not even by CPS, by a crazy person. She only returned them when the hospital found NO signs of abuse (even the bruise fading on my daughters face was consistent with regular childhood injuries) and after my husband called her from Iraq threatening her. She returned them with a police escort, but did not tell the police why they were there, when I did, the MP threatened her with arrest and pressed charges against her friend who had no business being near my children.
The next day I was visited by CPS and the police to get my statement on the accusations, accusations proven false. The SW was in shock because this woman had told her two weeks before that I was the best mom in the world and was now telling everyone I was a sexual predator. That I masturbated in front of mine and her children and had mutliple sex partners while my husband was gone. The SW, thankfully, ignored her accusations and then investigated this woman for emotional abuse on my and her children. The police demanded that I get the POA rescinded (it was done before they got there) and that my husband’s unit send him home (he got home three days later). My mother-in-law flew down and helped with the kids because as a result of this, I developed a staph infection in my incision, a migraine headache, and agoraphobia, and anxiety while on post. But the story didn’t end there…
Although CPS was going to drop the case, I had to clear up several false allegations this woman made against me at the hospital including that I had lost all rights to my older two children, who I had just weeks before she did this, around her. My older children were interviewed by CPS in the state where they live and it was discovered that this woman’s 13 year old son had molested my oldest daughter, which caused the woman to lose custody of him. My ex and his wife were outraged and threatened me with legal harm. although they did not follow through, realizing that I was physically ill the entire time this was going on and simply trusted the wrong person. This woman stalked and harrassed me from October 2006 to April 2007, when we moved to another state. She drive by my home, stalked my daughter at school (her kids went there) until I took the drastic measure of not only removing my child from her pre-school program (my legally blind child who needed the program), i also had her evicted from post and her daughter removed from her school. I also had her older children, who I loved like my own, arrested on several ocassions for vandalism, threats, stalking, etc. It broke my heart, it wasn’t their fault. I lived in fear for over six months!!! I was on medication, still recovering from surgery, my father died in another state, etc and it was hell. In fact, there are times I still live in hell. Her public profiles on several sites make veiled comments on the situation and it scares me that she could find my kids or me. She has lost her older two children because she was found to be abusive. Her husband left her and SHE BLAMES ME!
I know my story is long, but it needed to be told. I have not spoken of it for almost three year except to my husband but I felt the urge to speak now. The anonymous tip system is a BAD idea. it turns out she made the first call to CPS and the had friends make other calls to back up the story that I pushed my legally blind daughter down the stairs. She knew her son was molesting my older daughter, my husband confronted her about it, and she stated she was afraid he had done it to the younger two as well, so she decided to find someone to blame for it. ME! If I had known she made the first call, she would have never been allowed anywhere near me or my children again.
I am not a perfect mother, but I am a good mother. Except for the time I was ill, I kept a nice house, had my kids in activities and have always worked in public service. Thankfully, my incident turned out well, I have my kids and they were so young, they have forgotten being “examined” internally and externally by a doctor. But, if the SW had wanted to , my kids would have been in the system. I am not a stupid woman, I have a graduate degree and work in public service, but if it can happen to me, It can happen to anyone.
Comment by KP — September 1, 2009 @ 12:06 am
For those that feel lost, dont let your guard down, not for a second. Is true the program is a flaw. It was shocking to find this site. I am glad I did. My family agony was not really over after 5 days of separtion, we still under surveillance.
JB
Comment by JB — September 20, 2009 @ 2:38 am
My kids are all detained with CPS for 2 months now. It’s on only hearsay crap. I wonder about filling a kidnapping charge against CPS threw the police department. Yes they will make me look more crazy for doing that. I aam wondering if anyone has tried this.
Thanks,
Comment by Smith — October 6, 2009 @ 12:17 pm
KP- Military wife
Thank you for your story. I believe there is a MILITARY SECTION on this site’s Message Board.
We are very aware that CPS is a very corrupt, mismanaged, and non-professional institution.
Are you not entitled to free legal representation through your husband’s military service?
Please register to join the Message Boards here and help others who are also wondering about CPS’ intent.
And also, never SPEAK TO CPS. Anything you say will be twisted, spun, and mis-heard.
Thanks for your contribution to this site.
Comment by Fern — October 7, 2009 @ 5:28 am
Dear Linda,
It’s been a while since I have looked at your website and I would like to compliment you on the improvements you have made to make it so user-friendly.
I’m a husband and father of two sons, now ages 21 and 19, who were removed from our home ten and a half years ago. It took us almost one year to get them back home with us on a “trial visit” and the better part of another year until the court finally saw fit to dismiss the dependency case that had been our worst nightmare.
I work full time as a transactional lawyer in addition to being a family caregiver. My wife has been disabled as a result of multiple sclerosis for more than twenty years. During that time, we have had some on-and-off part-time help in the home, and are presently in the process of finding someone new to help out as our most recent helper became pregnant with her second child.
Very recently, a wonderful doctor who was my wife’s MS clinician for many years passed away. His passing brought up memories of how supportive he was when CPS inflicted its damage on our family, and I wrote a loving tribute in his memory that is posted at http://sciencedude.freedomblogging.com/?s=van+den+noort .
A memorial service will take place tomorrow morning.
Coming back and reading some of the posts on your site breaks my heart. The stories of families falsely accused and victimized by the system are only slightly less awful than the stories of those children who are truly victims of abuse.
Having heard so many such stories years ago, I am now finally ready to tell ours and have begun writing a book. It was this good doctor’s passing that moved me to finally begin the writing process.
What I have not delayed, however, is trying to do something to make things better for other families. I applaud your efforts in that regard, and I invite you and your readers to visit my blog at the url indicated above.
Personally, I am committed to supporing the efforts of the National Coalition for Child Protection Reform, a non-profit corporation that works at the policy level with legislatures to effect change where it will have the most broad and significant impact.
Thank you so much for maintaining this site. Your efforts are deeply appreciated.
Regards,
Steven H. Hirsch, Esq.
http://www.reasonableefforts.blogspot.com
Comment by Steven H. Hirsch — October 8, 2009 @ 1:47 pm
Unfortunately, in just as many cases, I have found that to be not quite the case. ,
Comment by John22 — October 22, 2009 @ 4:39 am
I am writing for a young couple that I know that has had their son taken away and put in a foster care home— this couple cannot afford a computer and I am assisting them in finding help for their situation– they went to court and the court process, based on verbal testimony and a 2006 law, terminated their parental rights on accusations that are NOT true—the 7 yr old child has been place in foster care and this case is almost a yr old– will be on October 28th, 2009 ! Because of the parents low income , having a attorney who be impossible for them & they have been actively trying to get their son back thru written letters & court info sent to Michigan legislators, govenor etc—- with NO results — These parents are devasted as to what has happened in their life and feel all their efforts so far have been in vain They have not seen or heard from their son since he was taken out of the home on Oct 28th, 2008 !!!!!– They are NOT guilty of what they’ve been accused of and it is amazing how the system can devastate the family unit, based on verbal information and NO criminal evidence of ANY kind to this child that they love dearly– Even one of the the psychologists who testified in the court case says that proper protocol had not been followed and that the parents have been “railroaded”.! Can someone please help us out with direction to get help !
Comment by Norma Clay — October 29, 2009 @ 5:51 am
Norma, I would take a trip to the state capitol to talk to the state representative about this. Also I’d file for a state administrative hearing. It seems absolutely wrong that they would not have visitation, at least, and a reunification plan. Have you seen the court order? Please look around the site for more ideas on fighting this case. Usually parental rights aren’t terminated until about 18 months after a child is detained.
Make Your Court Appointed Lawyer Work for YOU
Comment by LindaJoMartin — October 30, 2009 @ 3:03 pm